#Relatable

Written after reading "I Love Shopping" by Lauren Cook

If you give a mouse a cookie she will ask if it’s gluten free.

If you give me a cookie I will ask for some ice cream and hot fudge to go with it.

If I buy myself a lipstick I will buy myself another one tomorrow.

I like myself the most when I am being sexual.

I can sweat through any top.

Sometimes I think I have symptoms of depression but I am actually just lazy.

I write therefore I am.

My ex said “if you had a dick it would be small,” and I still don’t know why they insulted me like that.

I am insatiable. The hungriest mother fucker I know. I am constantly eating or thinking about eating. I am constantly shopping or thinking about shopping. I am constantly fucking or thinking about being fucked.

Therefore I have no money.

I was once asked “what is your aesthetic” and I said “tumblr indie sleaze ballet core pink hair basic normal girl core”.

When we want to fit into a certain aesthetic, does that mean we automatically do? Or do we have to engage with the aesthetic for a certain amount of time for it to count? Like how you have to live in New York City for basically forever to get to say that you’re a New Yorker. Can someone authentically fit into an aesthetic? Why do haters think that everything is disingenuous?

When will I feel valid in what I like and not feel like a poser?

How much of my life is a performance of self?

Am I allowed to say that I am a misandrist or is that cringe?

It is not embarrassing to give affection and it is not cringe to receive it.

Timothée Chalamet has me thinking a lot about greatness. I listen to the same songs on repeat, and rewatch the same shows and movies over and over. When I finish a book I immediately go back and reread my favorite quotes, then write something inspired by it. When I love a piece of art I can’t get enough of it. I love art so much it makes me sick. That is how I want people to engage with my work. That is how I will feel successful and great.

Writers think we are so fucking special. Maybe it’s because we are.

This is me btw. If you even care.